You know that feeling when you stand in front of your closet, and before you’ve touched a single hanger, there’s a tiny knot in your chest?
The quiet worry of what am I going to wear today?
Twenty minutes later comes the frustration. Nothing looks right. Nothing fits the way you want. None of it feels good enough.
Why do we do this to ourselves?
The beauty world says more steps mean better results. Serums, essences, toners, mists, ampoules. Most days it feels like the green lid jar of Pond’s Cold Cream got broken into seven expensive steps and sold back to us as an exhausting chore.
Being in and around fashion and beauty taught me the same lesson every time. Nobody needs the whole lineup. You need the one or two things that do the real work and fit the life you actually live. A routine you can keep beats a routine you admire.
We do the same thing to our closets. And to our days.
We’re told that to look stylish, feel happy, or stay relevant, we have to keep adding. More accessories. More supplements. More commitments. More noise.
An essential isn’t a checklist telling you to buy a camel trench you’ll wear twice. It’s the one that never makes you negotiate. You reach for it at 7:22 am, when the last thing you have room for is a debate with a sweater. You grab it, and it just says, I’ve got this.
Think about a chocolate cake. The chocolate is the essential. Without it, you don’t have a cake, just a pan of warm, flavorless flour. Now toss in a shot of espresso, and the chocolate tastes deeper and richer. It’s a nice touch but the espresso is an accent, not an essential.
Accents are fun, until we pile on three necklaces, a fussy scarf, and an extra jacket. That isn’t style. It’s nervous energy looking for a place to hide.
When the essentials are solid, the rest is just pure fun. Throw on the giant cocktail ring, swipe on the bold lip, or add the leopard coat whenever the mood strikes. Not to be on trend, but to channel your inner Bobby Brown. It’s your prerogative.
Not sure which fall Style Essentials you have? Here’s a free tool to help you find them…
Strip away the noise, and you’re left with the essentials. Here are a couple of my fall essentials:
Style: The boots I can’t wait to wear. A soft cashmere sweater. One rich layer that does the work - a leather bomber or a chocolate suede bag.
Happiness: Bundling up for a walk on a crisp, blue-sky afternoon, or sitting outside by the fire pit with a great glass of wine and my favorite people under a clear night sky.
Everyday: A handful of small candles with different scents that I find essential for fall ~ cinnamon, spiced apple, and pumpkin spice. (They’re small for a reason - you get the seasonal vibe without committing your entire house to pumpkin spice through Thanksgiving.)
Easy Edits to Try:
Remove one piece. Before you walk out the door, take something off. A ring, the scarf, the third layer. Let what’s left do the work.
Drop one obligation.
Pick something you do only because you think you're supposed to. Let it go for seven days. Odds are, the world keeps spinning.
Clear one surface.
Take everything off a single counter. Wipe it clean. Put back only what matters. Notice the space you just gave yourself.
Keep the essentials. Let the rest go.🥂
Regina
Editor-in-Chic, FashionSHEsta